December 15, 2017
In the last couple of years I have lost a few friends. And I think I understand the reason for this.
Two years ago I went to India and witnessed what I had managed to ignore. Poverty, suffering, and my ability to help others (which is quite large). (more info here and here)
I returned depressed. Previously I had thought that I was a good person. People seemed to like me, I (would have) helped old ladies across the road, I gave strangers warm smiles, I tried not to talk about people behind their backs… And I had managed to convince myself that doing those things made me a good person. Haha, what a joke.
To get myself through the depression I needed a purpose. All the problems there are, inequality, poverty, climate change, corruption, cancer, quantum gravity … they need a solution. I wanted to make the solution to all problems, artificial intelligence.
This purpose helped me forget about all the pain and suffering, or at least discount it. I wasn’t reminded of the suffering of others hourly.
So, given this purpose. I was very confused as to why others were not interested in AI, or relatedly, computer science (CS). I started preaching and ranting… a lot.
So next time I meet someone who is convinced that their decision are right I will try to remember what led me to a similar position.